It was the end of my first semester, freshman year,
when I made the life changing decision to transfer colleges. The decision was,
admittedly, a culmination of everything that had been building up inside my
core since the first two weeks of the semester. Somehow, I knew deep down that
I would not be staying at my first college for the rest of my academic career.
I would not be walking across the graduation stage of that particular college
in May of 2021. The decision took my family completely by surprise…probably
because I decided to make the announcement over Christmas dinner with all my
relatives packed tightly around my parents’ dining room table (in hindsight,
it’s a decision I don’t really regret, since it saved me a lot of explaining to
do in the future). I thought with my heart, not with my head, and it changed my
life.
I received my
acceptance to Siena College in late December of 2016. I distinctly remember
finishing an especially difficult swim practice (we were preparing for a meet
against our rival school), dragging my tired body into the locker room, and
pulling my phone out of my backpack, its screen illuminated with a new email
notification. In that second, I froze, reading the byline that said
“CONGRATULATIONS, YOU’RE A SAINT! #SIENA2021”. It took me a moment to
comprehend what had happened. Then, I screamed, effectively scaring the living
daylights out of my teammates. Fifteen minutes later, I was mess of happy tears
and attempting to thank 25 people for their congratulations. I’d been accepted
to my dream school! At this time, I couldn’t drive, so I ran out to my mother’s
minivan, hysterically screaming about my acceptance. She was equally jovial. I
called my grandparents, my dad, my siblings, and posted a screenshot of the
letter to Facebook. Today, I still look back at that memory with happiness. It
truly was a great ending to a busy day.
Fast forward to the
summer of that year, I had sent in my deposit and was more than ready to start
my school year at a new college. In stereotypical small-town-girl fashion, I
was extremely anxious to move away from my close-knit New England town and the
classmates I had grown up with since Kindergarten, especially after working
full time all summer to save up some money for textbooks and general spending.
My bags were packed, cardboard boxes filling my parents’ sun room, ready to go
to the Empire State (specifically, Albany, NY). In late August of 2017, I moved
to Siena College with a new roommate and the promise of a new adventure. In
that moment, I was happy. I was enthralled by the possibilities of being at a
new school with a completely new body of classmates (I was the only one from my
high school to attend Siena in seven years, so I knew I wouldn’t be seeing
anyone there that I already knew).
In the beginning, it
was fun. Orientation was great, everything went well. I was getting along with
my roommate. I was taking classes that I— at least partially –enjoyed. I joined
six clubs that allowed me to pursue my interests in new ways (shout out to everyone
I met through those! There are too many of you to name in this article, but you
know who you are! I miss you all a lot!) I also had a date coming up (in
hindsight, it didn’t go too well) with a guy I sat next to in my writing class.
However, there was something I was having trouble with. I wasn’t making any
friends. Everyone else was finding their groups, their cliques, swiftly making
new best friends and going to parties every weekend having the time of their
lives. Unfortunately, most weekend nights, I found myself either sitting in my
room or doing homework in the library. That took me by surprise. While I can be
shy sometimes, I had been working wicked hard to get myself out there and meet
new people every chance I received. I mean, it was new, and I wanted to make
friends desperately! I attended campus events. As I said earlier, I joined six
clubs. I had some acquaintances in my classes that I often had short but nice
conversations with. Regardless, no matter how hard I tried, I just wasn’t
finding my group. I beat myself up over it (honestly, looking back, I may have
been too hard on myself), calling my mom and crying a lot to her about my
situation. That was the first indicator that I wasn’t happy where I was. That’s
not to say I didn’t make any friends my second semester (shout out to Alyssa,
Noelle, and Rosa!), but my experiences during my first semester left a lasting,
negative impression on me. For a college that promises such a “close-knit”
community, I wasn’t feeling the vibes.
The second indicator
was simple. Money. Regardless of the merit scholarship I was receiving from
Siena (which covered my room and board), I couldn’t wrap my head around the
amount of money I was spending on my education staying at this school. Without
divulging that exact amount, I can say I would have been in debt upwards of six
figures. Since I’m paying for 100% of my student loans by myself, I couldn’t
afford my undergraduate and graduate degrees if I stayed at Siena. That was
another factor in my decision to leave.
The third indicator I
wasn’t happy was my lack of enthusiasm in my classes. Sure, I had straight A’s,
but I wasn’t enjoying what I was learning. I was a Political Science major with
an International Relations minor and a certificate in Pre-Law. As much as I
love politics and law, I found I didn’t love studying it in a classroom
setting. While I had some excellent professors, who taught Political Science in
a fair, objective way, I also had some awful professors who taught Political Science
in a biased, demonizing-of-the-opposing-opinion way. Personally, I was not a
fan of that and felt attacked in the very classrooms I was expected to feel
safe in and free to express my authentic opinions for debate. I was not
enjoying my classes. So, I changed my major, but Siena’s program for my new
major was…well, not the best. That was the tipping point.
By Christmas break, I
had made up my mind about 90%. However, I still wanted to talk with my parents
about my decision. Nearly a year after I had received my decision from Siena, I
was beginning another journey for a new environment.
Obviously, I
eventually chose Westfield State University. Having reached the end of my first
semester at my new college, I can officially confirm that I am in a much
happier place than I was last year. I made the right decision. I love living at
home with my family, commuting to campus, and I can work part-time since I have
access to my car (a luxury I was not granted at Siena). Also, I have something
I didn’t have before: I love my college. I love being an Owl. Regardless of all
the factors that made me leave, not everything was horrible. I made some
wonderful, lifelong friends and discovered truths about myself that I never saw
before. Siena College is no longer my favorite place on Earth, but it wasn’t
entirely a negative experience. Bottom line, it just wasn’t for me. Students
who are considering transferring, my only advice is this: Finish the year. It,
honestly, could be the tipping point between transferring and staying. I highly
recommend staying for the year.