By Nathan Godard
After the snowy and frigid cold winter vacation, the senior class returned to Westfield State University to their final semester of their undergraduate college careers. I being among them, returned and lost myself in the move-in process, accompanied by the same familiar feeling as though I was a first year or a sophomore. Though it felt no different to return, when I finally set my room up and gathered the materials for class starting on Monday, a sinking feeling, not one of dread or of sadness, but of anxiety crept into my bones.
The day-to-day then began to roll and I lost myself in my schedule: meetings, classes, research, reading, but all the while a sense of anxiety pressing down upon my temple. The strange yet matter-of-fact knowledge that I won’t have to do my Housing Deposit smacked me in the face as a reminder that I do not have much time left. With that an anxiety festers. Where this anxiety comes from, I found, is very important to talk about as I believe that we all experience this in one form or another.
The final semester of a senior year is the beginning of the end some students would say. A chill of uncertain existential malaise grips the hearts of some. The expectations of your peers, your parents, and yourself seems to be at stake. A question gnaws at your bones: have I done enough? Will I regret how I spent my years hear?
These questions are built on the false notion that graduating college is a sort of summit; if that summit is not climbed and conquered to the satisfaction of not ourselves but the invisible powers that set up these hoops of life to jump through—we will somehow be forever condemned. There is a feeling that from then on, we will be tainted and that our future is sullied.
In the end, we are all terrified of ‘failing’, whatever that entails and however that is defined by the individual. The fear of being a burden on those that supported us after our brief foray into the world mounts as we near closer and closer to the month of May. The sheer amount of mental and financial investment that has been put in by the student and their family makes the post college limbo stage among the most exciting or the most terrifyingly humbling experiences one can have as an adult.
What it comes down to in the end, is not whether or not you feel as though have achieved the goals and expectations of society or your parents, but the ones that you set for yourself. What we do here does not define who we are, who we will be, or where we will be 30 years. Many doors may open sooner because of what we do here will either guarantee our future success or our future ‘failure’, whatever that means. What is important is that we define our own happiness and live by our own expectations, because life isn’t as simple as high school and even college may seem to illustrate it.
In high school there is a very simple for outline that your life is supposed to follow: you graduate high school, you go to a 4-year college, you get a job in your field, you move out of your parents’ house, you settle down with someone, and you work until you retire. Highschool also ties a certain timeline to these expected bookmarks of life as well, but the funny thing is that life isn’t as clean as that. Things happen outside of our control that can derail our lives and everyone’s life is different. There are many paths to what we define as success, not just the one that our education system would perhaps like us to think.
One of these bookmarks of life is coming up for many seniors at Westfield State University. Many students have been riding the wave of education from high school to college, and it is easy to get lost in the routine of college life where the idea of it ending is rather an odd proposition, even though intellectually you know that this is how it works.
I think some seniors need to hear reassurance, that it will be okay. Things will end up working out for you one way or another. For those who have a very structured plan for their life understand that as Gandalf said, “even the very wise cannot see all ends.” If part of your plan falls apart, this does not mean your life falls apart. Life is not so linear that every plan will fall into place. For those who are unsure of their future, you have your entire life to think about what you want to do with your life, because a job you may you get out of college does not have to be your career or a long-term commitment. It is never too late to pursue something you know you’d love to do.
The most important thing I believe is necessary at this time in our lives is to remember that you are not defined by the job or the career that you have. It is not defined by how much money you make, the material things you collect through your life. Rather, what defines you is what you choose or allow to define you. It is your choice. And it is a choice that you will be making for the rest of your life.
Over the years, you will choose to be defined by different things throughout your life because life changes you as you experience more of it. And that is okay. There is no one way experiencing life.
Take a deep breath, work hard, rest when you can, entertain yourself when you can, don’t give up, and don’t let society’s expectations sully your experience of this life. Life is too short even though it is the longest thing we will ever experience.
